4 Steps I Consistently Take to Be My Best Self

Here’s a golden nugget of good news: you don’t have to wait for the new year to roll around to reinvent and better yourself. I don’t know if it was a quarter-life crisis or the exhaustion from my ever-growing list of worries — but something made me decide that this year, enough was enough. I decided it was time to become my best self.

Ironically, I did happen to jump on the resolution train around the new year — but I know that the decision to improve upon myself goes far deeper than a standard New Year’s resolution. The fact is that there is no magical time to start making changes in your life. You can decide to reinvent yourself whenever you chose — whether it’s January, July, Halloween or the second Tuesday in November. 

So, in the quest to be my best self, I came up with a few steps that helped me figure out and achieve my goal.

1. Ask myself what I really want.

What do I really want? It’s an easy question to ask but difficult to answer. Being a millennial and trying to get your life together is hard. We have the expectations from the generations before us to figure out everything by a certain age because that’s what they did. But it’s not that simple anymore. The world around us is changing and so is our place in it.

The good news is that you don’t have to find one thing and stick with it. You can do something for a few years and then switch to something else completely. You can change jobs or cities or find the one place and career that you love and stick with it forever. Once you figure that out, you can think about what you want — whether it’s for right now or forever, and go out and get it.

I took the time to look inside of myself in order to figure out my own definition of my best self. Even if it seemed unattainable, I took note of it anyway.

The world is full of opportunities. Go for it!

2. Create a Vision Board.

Tap into your inner child because this requires you to break out the craft supplies and get to work. Vision boards are all the rage and for good reason: they work. Obviously they aren’t magic boards that manifest whatever you post onto them — although that would be great and we’d all be millionaires. (Someone invent that, please!)

Vision boards are more about mental stimulation. The process of creating a vision board forces you to fine-tune your dream. You choose the images that best align with what you want and look at it every day. Your vision board serves as a reminder of why you started and a source of inspiration. It helps you pinpoint what you want to achieve. From what I understand, it does work.

I created a vision board a while back and from a strictly artistic standpoint, I’m proud of it. I found, printed and pasted images of what I want in my life: love and marriage, a career in my field of interest, to be fit and healthy, and I included the many places I want to visit or live. I also added pictures of women I admire, inspirational quotes and so forth. I placed it beside the door of my bedroom. Every morning before I leave for the day, I take a long look at it and it reminds me to focus on the big picture and be conscious of what I am doing each day to work toward my best self.

be the best you vision board
Example of a Vision Board from Nanette Saylor | Flickr

3. Fix what needs to be fixed.

Every individual has their own set of problems or challenges to work through. Getting past these roadblocks can be incredibly difficult, and giving you advice to “just fix it” oversimplifies what is probably a very complex issue. I can only speak for myself. I knew I couldn’t move forward in bettering myself if I didn’t stop what was holding me back.

I suffer from anxiety. I suppose I was always anxious, now looking back, but it’s gotten worse as I’ve gotten older. I found myself feeling it bad last year and it was starting to hinder me more than ever. I decided that with the coming new year I would really try and help myself. Anxiety has a way of draining all of your positivity and inspiration and leaves you feeling hopeless and unable to do anything except go through the motions. Even though that feeling wasn’t constant for me, I knew I needed to do something effective.

Personally, I enjoy listening to hypnosis recordings. A few years ago, I came across a website that offers a countless number of hypnosis downloads for almost anything imaginable. I’ve used them in the past and for me, they’ve proven to be successful. I found one for anxiety and I’ve been listening to it. It’s slow going but I feel that it helps me. Of course, this is personal and something I’ve found that works for me. For someone else, it may be different. You have to find what works for you, whatever it may be and use it.

4. Let it go.

Cue the Frozen soundtrack, find your inner Elsa, and let it go. As busy human beings with jobs, responsibilities, and relationships, our minds are constantly running. Even when we relax, the wheels in our brains still turn and spin and try to remind us of all we have to do or worry about. Add that to having anxiety and you pretty much have a mind that’s faster than warp speed. At some point you have to take a step back from yourself and separate the important from the not so important.

I am always reminding myself to focus my energy on the big things that matter instead of sweating the small stuff. When you finally get the hang of it, you realize how freeing it is and how you can move forward in achieving your goals without the unnecessary weight of worry and self-doubt holding you back. If I want my best self to shine, I need to allow myself to let go of the things that don’t matter.

So, sing the song (I know you’re probably singing it now anyways, sorry) and let it all go.

There it is, the four steps to a better you. Will it be easy? Nope, not in the slightest. Worthwhile endeavors are usually not. If you want to change something, you have to work for it. Find what works for you, put it into action, and go be the best you!